Owning Your Identity: Why It’s Important to Stand on Your Own
March 16, 2007
Being in business over the past three years for myself has been one of the biggest learning lessons I have ever had. I’ve discovered that this experience teaches you more about who you are and what type of people are in this world than any other life experience could teach. Over the past three years, I have had both good and bad experiences with people (more good of course!) and it never ceases to amaze me… some people just don’t know how to have, and cherish, an identity of their own.
Being a virtual assistant, I encounter a lot of these identity issues. There are virtual assistants in business who are not interested in growing partnerships and relationships. A lot of them just don’t know the best way to grow an identity of their own and separate themselves from the crowd. This is one of the reasons I started The VA Coach - I want to coach people not only to launch a successful virtual assistance business but also how to find their inner identity and run their businesses morally and ethically.
I have found that when someone in business does not have an identity, a strong base to stand on, they then break some of the most basic ethical codes. They take business from the people they know and work with, they copy what someone else is doing in their business, they speak unprofessionally about their colleagues and they go to great lengths to stand out of integrity. These people aren’t necessarily doing this out of maliciousness, I truly believe it’s because they haven’t figured out their own magic formula for success yet.
When you are a confident business person who is very sure of your identity, you tend to get clear and focused on what it is you want and then you go after that - in a very true and positive manner. You form friendships, relationships and bonds with people who have similar goals in mind and you form mutually beneficial partnerships. You are then able to bring things to your clients and your colleagues that you weren’t able to before. You start thinking of others before you think of yourself.
When you aren’t a confident business person and perhaps you may be a bit envious of someone else’s success, you can then find yourself acting in a way that isn’t true to who you are - isn’t true to your identity. When this happens, you aren’t able to feel good about yourself inside and therefore, that projects onto your business and how you interact with your clients and colleagues.
The best way to find out who you are and locate your identity is to start a gratitude journal. I have one and I write in it each day. Instead of focusing on the negative things that may come in and out of my business, I focus on the positive and I then generate more positive feelings for both myself and my clients. By looking at what you are grateful for, you’ll start to feel good about who you are which will then translate into you making others feel good.
Always remember, who you are today is a reflection of your past attitudes and behaviors. You can decide today, right now, to make a change and stand on your own Be true to yourself and success and the things you want in life will come easily to you.
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